Apr 9, 2012

Pride and Prejudice

I was living in a small town in Western Massachusetts at the time. I had met, in a neighboring small town, a wonderful horsie kid and her mom and grandmother. The mom’s name was Sally. She was named after Sally Swift, who had been the grandmother's counselor at a childhood horse camp, long ago, and who had clearly, even then and as a very young person,  been able to make a pretty big impression.  I knew that Sally Swift’s influence was deep and real and seemed well deserved. I found the book, CENTERED RIDING, to be interesting and thought provoking but also weird and somewhat confusing. . I knew also that Sally had influenced some excellent horsemen and riders, including Denny Emerson, who I consider a real stylist.

But I wasn’t sure what to expect at the clinic. I got there early and had a muffin and coffee while waiting for things to start. This was a three day CR jumping clinic, with Susan Harris, who I also admired as the author of GROOMING TO WIN, as the clinician. As I waited, I looked around at the people congregating.

It was a mixed bunch.

With me, as a fellow Smith instructor, was another life long George Morris type who was little and tough and an excellent rider, a few years older than me. We were joined by a woman in her mid forties who had only been riding a couple of years but who was a total CR head. She had a few students outside the Smith program who were also attending the clinic. In all there were about 30 people.

Susan arrived. I had never met her in person. I did not know it was she. I saw only a morbidly obese woman with a shy and friendly demeanor. I rolled my eyes in my head, dismissively, as only a tall skinny snotty rider bitch can roll them.

I was immediately mortified to learn that this was Susan.

(Should I tell you now that I have a gift for this kind of thing? Oy, the stories I can, and probably will, tell, in the interest of humility and disclosure! I have earned every single cosmic slap I have ever received, but do I ever learn? Um...are we speaking rhetorically?)

The clinic began. We introduced ourselves and gave short bios. The group seemed to be divided somewhat in to two groups. In my mind it was Me's and Them's. Horse girls, and…er…Non Horse Girls. *We* were skinny, fit, in breeches and Dehners, and *they*, not so much, in Kerrits and suede half chaps. Ha! My inner snob was having a field day!

And we all know how that sort of thing ends, don’t we!















18 comments:

  1. waitingfor the next installment kiddo!!!

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  2. Abby, I take it you don't have children? It's the source of a good 40lbs per child. And THEN you get hit with menopause, which packs on another 20. Every time I hate my riding body at this age, I remember that even though it's harder to ride with excess weight, it's what's under it that counts. Muscle, muscle, muscle.

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    1. Have two. I actually gained 90 lbs with the first one. Yep. And so far have been ok with menopause, just gained a couple. Knock wood! And you are right..one can ride very well without being a skinny minny!

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    2. Then you have been very blessed! For the children AND the ability to lose baby fat. How did you do it?

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    3. I nursed them both for a year and think that had a lot to do with it. But we also lived in the country, half the time I had no car, had six acres, ponies, horses, gardens...no child care or help, so I think I just didnt have time to eat >;->

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    4. Yep, that will do it. As you age your body slows down and it doesn't burn fat as fast or effectively no matter how much excercise you get. The last 2 months, I have shoveled roughly 40k of gravel. Think THAT would move a lb or two? Nope. And I have a small stomach and don't eat large volumes of food. sigh. Old age sucks.

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    5. Hee Elain >;-> but as they say, it beats the alternative! I cant take credit for being thin. Both my parents were beanpoles as were all my relatives/ancestors. My daughters are both 6' tall and wear size 2 and 4's. I think hald the time it is just the good or bad luck to be born to whatever geno/phenotype our parents were. Be that as it may, if you get tired of moving your gravel, you can come and help me move mine >;->

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  3. We're all guilty of making inaccurate first impressions. You just have to be flexible enough to change your first impression :)

    The first time I saw Susan I was a little surprised too...

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    1. Im actually not a weight snob, but that day, with my own insecurities so rampant, I think I was more sensitive to stuff that wouldnt normally have been noticed. But yes, Susan is heavy. And I can only imagine how hard it must be for such a gifted horse person to have a metabolism that fights her dreams. And I have to say that CR has helped many of my heavy students through the years; getting and keeping that balance and movement awareness is even more important when you are a heavier rider. But I vowed that in this blog I would tell it like it is/was, so be prepared for the big, the bad, and the ugly. I can only promise that it will all be at my expense >;->

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    2. I think you a MOST courageous woman to bare your soul to the blogging world. Most people wouldn't strip down to their insecurities or reveal their weaknesses. I salute you!

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    3. Aw, Elaine, what a nice thing for you to say. I just hope that people see that the horse life journey has many levels, and that there is room to grow in many ways. I have grown up with and through horses. I look back and can hardly believe some of the things I used to take for granted. I wish I could apologize to every horse I was unfair to all those years ago. Humility is a good thing, and I havent always had as much as I should have. Im grateful that the universe kept slapping me till I started to get the idea >;->

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  5. It took a few years (decades!) but I think I'm learning to keep my less than complimentary thoughts to myself, because foot in mouth disease is not fun!

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    1. Ohhhhhh you are soooo right. I had *not* said anything, nor roled my eyes *at* anyone that day THANK GOD, so luckily I could be ashamed of myself privately. Man, I have put my foot in it a couple of times in my life and I still cringe at the memories. Oy! If I could take some things back, what I would give! >;->

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    2. We have ALL been there. It's part of being human.

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    3. We have all been there. It's part of being human.

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